Monday, February 27, 2012

some background

Before I get into some heavier posts, I thought I might explain a few things.

I've always had issues with my mom. She truly loves my sisters and me, but she is very hard on us, controlling, and doesn't understand personal space/privacy. (Both my youngest sister and I think she may have an anxiety disorder also.)
While in high school and college, during which my anxiety manifested into an eating disorder, I didn't have a very good relationship with my mom. It didn't get much better until I graduated from college.
I'm trying to be better about letting her know when she hurts my feelings or says something she shouldn't, but it really helped being far away and out of the house.

The only other relationship I've been in besides Chris was not a good one. I'm still working through a lot of things with that. I didn't realize how deeply I was hurt until months after I left the ex. That sucked.
Chris is trying to help me without knowing everything. It's hard for me to talk about things, but he is very patient with me.

I guess when you think you're worth nothing, you'll stay in relationships where other people think you're nothing, too.
(Not that that makes the things that other people do to you your fault! Never is it ever your fault.)

But I'm learning to be stronger. :)

PS - Tomorrow I have my second therapy session!

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